i was talking to a friend some time ago about how my friends make me want to be better and they were like "that's nice but you should be better for yourself..." like ok girl. shut up. that's not what i meant.

it isn't even that i don't want to be better on my own. obviously i want to be a decent person and think that everyone should aspire to be a "good" person (whatever that means to you...) but i guess it's just that i see my friends as people who are like... not necessarily above me, but just people that i want to prove myself to as being worthy of being around them and in their lives. like just thinking they're so amazing that you want to make sure you're someone who deserves to be around that amazingness. you know what i mean..?